Skip to main content

Monstrous mothers



Reams have been written about the sanctity of a mother’s love. Every culture portrays mothers as reflections of God,  and their love as an unselfish and unconditional one. No doubt! There are many poems and songs singing the glory of motherhood.

In fact, a very poignant song from a 1958-Tamil movie, Thai Pirandal Vazhi Pirakkum, says it all. When you hear M.S. Rajeswari croon to Kannadasan's lyrics, one’s heart melts away. It goes like this:

Manukku maram barama,      (Is a tree burden to earth?)

marathukku ilai barama,         (Is a leaf burden to a tree?

kodikku kai barama,                 (Is a fruit burden to climber?)

pettradutha kuzhandai thaikku barama,    (Is a child burden to mother)

While basking in the warmth of the song one morning, it was an irony that I ended up reading a news report that completely threw me off the balance. It was a dreadful story about a young woman who repeatedly assaulted her infant to win back her lover. A 22-year-old woman from Chithoor in Andhra Pradesh, was recently arrested for repeatedly assaulting her 18-month-old baby. She not just tortured the baby but took videos of the same and sent it to her boyfriend to placate him, who had been maintaining a distance ever since the birth of the child under the pretext that the child resembled the father. 

Separated from her husband a few months ago, the young woman, who also has a child aged 4, was at her mother's when the incident happened. After the videos of the woman brutally beating her baby went viral, one of the relatives who happened to see it, informed the father of the children who rushed to take them back with him. The woman was taken into custody for culpable homicide and assault.

Unable to make sense of the situation, my first thought was that maybe the woman was mentally ill or had some psychological issues. But no! She was declared to be normal and stable. It was appalling to learn that she inflicted such brutal wounds on her little one with her fist! Images of her arrest flashed on media showed her moving with the least remorse. 

Similarly, a couple of days ago, I was rattled by yet another report about a mother murdering her 3-year-old daughter as she felt the child sided with her father most of the time! 

It is quite disturbing to see a rise in such cases of child abuse by parents, especially young mothers. I am not advocating that a woman, on becoming a mother, should dedicate her life to her child, pushing aside her needs and wants. There could be numerous factors and circumstances, favourable and unfavourable, which may have led to the conception. What beats me is the logic behind harassing an infant, more precisely one’s own child, to foster an illicit affair or make a point. This is an abuse of motherhood.

I am no judge of the travails of anyone and I am well aware that each person’s life journey is unique. But having grown up in a culture celebrating mothers as synonyms of love and sacrifice, I unable to stomach such heinous acts. While on one hand, there are parents who go overboard with their love hampering the natural development of children, there are monstrosities like these that completely shake you up. 

Children have always been my weakness. My son constantly teases me that I go bonkers at the sight of babies and young children and become oblivious to the world around me. Perhaps it is this penchant that helped me switch my two-decade-long journalistic career to being a Montessori adult with ease. And it is for the same reason, I am deeply affected by news stories concerning children. Haunted by the painful cries of the hurting infant, I lie awake in bed with an ardent prayer: God! Save the little ones!

 

“The essence of motherhood is not restricted to women who have given birth; it is a principle inherent in both women and men. It is an attitude of the mind. It is love - and that love is the very breath of life. No one would say, 'I will breathe only when I am with my family and friends; I won't breathe in front of my enemies.' Similarly, for those in whom motherhood has awakened, love and compassion for everyone are as much part of their being as breathing.” -    Mata Amritanandamayi

 

 

 

 

 

 

Comments

Tulaja said…
Motherhood can be thrust on women. However, once you are there, there must occur an inexplicable process resulting in unfailing, uninhibited, infinite love towards child you have. If not, the child is better fostered by a loving parent it deserves.

Popular posts from this blog

The emotion called Katta Pai!

    A couple of weeks ago, my husband had inadvertently given three bags of washed clothes to an unknown ironing person. He said some new person had come asking for clothes to iron when he was on the phone, and he had handed them over to him. And now, all his new pants were missing. My first reaction was, “Oh dear! All my good Katta Pais!”   I know I know… but I really couldn’t help it. Katta Pais, or what we call the Big Shopper bags, are not just some random objects; they are, as the new lingo for all things close to the heart goes, an emotion! There have been many Instagram reels by various groups around the theme of Katta Pais. The most hilarious one for me was the one by Vikkals Vikram group when the son informs his mother that he scored cent per cent in Class X Math exam or came state first in Class XII or even that he got a handsomely paying job abroad, her reaction was a simple smile. But when he says that he said no to Katta Pai at a saree shop in line with ...

Hair now, gone tomorrow!

  Today, my husband was pleasantly surprised when he called out from the bathroom for a shampoo bottle. Normally, this would prompt a tirade about his laziness, followed by my hurried hand off of our regular brand of shampoo. But today, I handed him expensive bottles of shampoo and conditioner with a smile, saying, “With love.” Though puzzled, he was happy to indulge in the fancy products. I quietly slipped away before he realised they were the result of one of my hair care experiments gone wrong. Since moving into our new home, my obsession with hair care has reached new heights. Hair loss is such a rampant problem in my community that it’s probably the only topic people don’t argue about in our WhatsApp group. In a desperate attempt to save what’s left of my hair, I’ve tried everything: onion shampoo, rice water conditioner, WoW serum, Adivasi hair oil—you name it, I’ve tried it! Adding insult to injury, my mother delights in reminding me, “You used to have such thick hair I ...

Enough, Just as You Are

“Hey, you’ve put on weight since the last time we met!” This isn’t an uncommon greeting from one of my friends. Trust me, he doesn’t mean to hurt—but somehow, he always does. He’s not a mean guy; in fact, he’s one of those friends I can call in the middle of the night for help. But that’s just his way of talking—not just with me, but with everyone. I’ve tried explaining to him that this sort of comment is body shaming and that it’s neither kind nor funny. But he just waves me off, insisting it’s all harmless fun. The truth? He’s far from alone. Comments like these are ingrained in our everyday conversations, especially among women. Often, they come from people who claim to mean well. Think about it—how many times have you heard a relative or a friend casually drop a remark like, “Your dress seems tighter. Gained weight, huh?” For me, it’s my aunt. She never fails to greet me with, “Enna nalla sappadare pole irukke?!” (Translation: “You seem to be eating well!” ) I know she do...